Well I think yesterday proved to be a bit too much excitement for me. Being back at school and being able to just let my tics out and tic freely was great! But I think the stimulation got to me because when I got home my tics got so bad that my leg and muscle tightening tics brought me to the ground twice in a period of only 5 minutes. Both times I ended up in a odd position sitting on the floor with all my muscles constricted and tensing.
This kind of thing has never really happened before for me and new tics/ things like this always kind of scare me because I don't know if they will stick or how frequent they will become. I was a bit scared a first and worried that this would become a regular thing that would happen at school or out in public. My dog is looked concerned enough, lol, and I think my friends would be highly concerned too if this kind of thing started happening regularly. I stayed sitting on my chair for a good while and working on my lap top before trying to get up and walk around again, but the feeling of needing to tighten all my muscles and drop to the floor just kept nagging at me with a vengeance.
I stayed sitting and doing homework on my laptop for most of the night, but when I got into bed I ran into real problems. It took me until midnight to actually fall asleep because of how bad my tics were in bed, and I woke up again at 2am ticcing like crazy. All my muscles in my body were tightening, tensing, and contracting which was pulling me into odd postures and position and making me squirm all over my bed. Then my leg muscles and arm muscles would tighten and my joints would just lock in a stick straight position. My weighted blanket was of no help and my tics just kept throwing the blanket off of me. I was trying so hard to go back to bed, but the tics just kept coming and coming with no sign of letting up. The premonitory urge I get before ticcing was SO strong that I couldn't even believe it and it just felt like I was going to explode if I even tried keep my body still. Staying still was simply not an option. I got so frustrated during the night with my tics and wanted more than anything to just be able to lie still and go to sleep. I tried getting up and walking around, getting a snack bar, reading, getting on my laptop, and getting water but nothing worked.
I was wide awake and ticcing like crazy trying to go back to sleep from 2am to 6am. And my alarm for school goes off at 7am.....great. So that was pretty much the worst night I have ever had with my tics as far as I can remember. I have had many first days back to school after break, but I have never quite had this severe of a reaction as far as tics are concerned.
I was determined to go to school today though and I figured if I was just so tired that I couldn't make it through the day that I could go home. So I drove to school and I was surprisingly not as tired as I thought I was going to be. I was still of course very tired, but never so tired that I thought I needed to go home. My friend Steam Punk thinks I wasn't all that tired today because I never went into deep REM sleep last night and the hours I did get were spaced out. I had pretty bad tics all day, but nothing compared to last night. The good thing was that I never dropped to the floor. A few times I had the urge to tighten all my muscles and drop to the floor but I had enough control to find a seat and sit down before I fell. I think the dropping to the floor tic may become a tic that do when my tics get really really bad but since my tics were not really really bad today I had control over it enough to avoid falling on the ground. I really hope I will sleep well tonight. I so need a good night's sleep!
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